Now that Christmas is over, reviewing if you spent too much money and why while the season is still fresh in your mind is essential. You can make a plan now, based on last month’s Christmas spending, to spend more wisely 10 months from now when Christmas rolls around again.
When Bookworm attended private school, I always struggled with the idea of giving his teacher a Christmas present. After all, does it look like I’m asking for preferential treatment if I give a gift? To avoid the potential ethical conflict, I would give the teacher a Christmas card and wait until the end of the year to give a gift. That way, our relationship was over, and no matter what I gave, the teacher’s opinion about my son and his work would not be affected.
Americans are not alone in their desire to give their kids’ teachers presents. The findings of a recent survey have provided evidence that the age-old tradition of parents in the UK treating their children’s teachers to a Christmas present is well and truly alive and kicking. UK budgeting account specialist thinkmoney.co.uk commissioned the investigation, which found that roughly a fifth of British adults give Christmas presents to their child’s teacher. I couldn’t find data on American parents, but I’m guessing many more than 20% give their children’s teachers a Christmas present.
Why Do Parents Give Christmas Gifts to Teachers?
Why do parents like to give presents to their children’s teachers? Let’s take a look at some of the possibilities:
It’s tradition! – Christmas is all about traditions. Could giving presents to teachers be another festive custom we just do automatically?
Raw ambition – …or do parents have an ulterior motive when they smilingly hand over a gift to their progeny’s teacher? It might be that some moms and dads believe a box of chocolates or a bottle of wine could pave the way to good exam results for their kids.
Contrition – There’s nothing like a good Christmas present as a means of saying sorry. The mothers and fathers of particularly unruly youngsters might feel a gift for the person who looks after their child for five days a week shows them how much they appreciate it.
Sweet disposition – Much of the above is a little cynical, so we’ll adopt a more cheery view and end the discussion by saying that maybe – just maybe – the majority of the parents who offer presents to their child’s teacher are doing so out of the kindness of their hearts. Thinkmoney’s director of communications Ian Williams agrees: “It’s heartening to see that hard-working parents can still find some spare cash to show their appreciation for their children’s teachers during the festive holiday. Christmas can be a difficult time financially for parents, particularly when the economy hasn’t been doing well. Our research shows that people really do think of others at Christmas time.”
Should You Cut Costs and Eliminate Your Child’s Teacher’s Present at Christmas?
During the holiday season, it can feel like everyone is vying for your money. You need to buy gifts or leave larger than normal tips for the hair dresser, mail carrier, babysitter, teachers, basically anyone that helps you during the year.
I reduced the amount I had to pay out at Christmas by giving my child’s teacher a gift at the end of the school year instead.
If you’d still like to give a gift, remember, it doesn’t have to cost a lot. You could make something like cookies or even a meal. If you’re crafty, you could create something the teacher could display in the classroom. The choice is yours.
What is your experience? Do you give your child’s teacher a present at Christmas?
Another irrelevant topic. Not giving teachers a Christmas gift? Really? It’s January! Secondly, wouldn’t you want to show gratitude to the Instructor that plays several roles in your child’s life–6 hours a day? Dealing with the pressures of state mandates, school administrators and crazy ass parents isn’t enough for you to at least show gratitude with a small token during the holidays? Shame on you for writing this irrelevant topic!
I’m not saying not giving them a gift at all. If parents would like to give a gift, I’m recommending giving a gift at the end of the year to avoid a potential conflict of interest. As a former teacher, I know that I felt uncomfortable when a student gave me a present, especially if it was lavish. I would have preferred, if I was to get a gift, to get it at the end of the year, when the professional relationship was over. This is also a good way for families on tight budgets to spread out the Christmas expenses instead of having to pay for everything in December.
Oh, that’s interesting! I teach, and it never even occurred to me that someone might try to ‘buy’ good grades or preferential treatment for their child, so it has never bothered me at all to receive presents from my students.
And honestly, I think, if there are parents who actually do that, they are a tiny, tiny percentage and it would be a shame if worrying about them took away from the appreciation a teacher might otherwise have for a sweet gift. The vast majority of parents are just trying to do something sweet and kind for the person who takes care of their children most of the day! If you just accept them in that light, even if you happen to receive a gift that isn’t meant that way, the person giving it won’t succeed. 🙂
And if the family is worried about having to pay for everything in December, they could always set aside that money in June and save it for the next Christmas. 🙂
That being said, I think your idea can also be lovely (It’s also nice to receive something fun at the end of the year, where you might not be expecting it!), but I just wouldn’t discourage parents from giving teachers presents at Christmas because they are afraid it might come across the wrong way, because I really don’t think that’s the case for most teachers!
Hi. My children are grown but when they were in school, they (not me) always gave the teachers a Christmas gift. Why? Because they wanted to. My husband is a retired School Bus Driver. He would receive lots of sweets on the holidays. One family always gave him a gift certificate for a local restaurant. Some never brought gifts. He always treated his bus kids the same. He says his most precious gifts were not bought with money but were the handmade cards and art projects that the kids would give to him. He keeps them in a folder.
That’s a sweet story and just goes to show that you don’t have to spend a lot of money to show someone they’re appreciated. I think people forget that.
I have always given my gifts to my kids teachers. I would feel awful not doing so. They are with our kids 6 hours a day – doing more than just teaching them their ABC’s. To show appreciation (a token or something more expensive) is just the right thing to do and the right example to set for your children. In your case, you thought a card was enough – and that is fine. So whether its a card, some cookies or a gift card it’s just the right thing to do!
I was not always able to give a gift to the teacher every year. Sometimes I let my kids make the teacher a special gift. One year I asked my friend (a kindergarten teacher) what kind of gift does a teacher really like and she told me things that help with her class room or things that were truly from the kids and not the parents. This year my boys decided what each of the teachers would receive. I also made them an ornament for their tree at home. I think that a good teacher would understand they are there to teach and not expect a gift. There are other ways to thank a teacher such as helping in the class room, giving time instead of money.
Thanks for the comment. I agree with you! I think homemade gifts also don’t carry the potential conflict as store bought gifts do.
My kids give their teachers gifts too that are home made gifts. I try to help the girls make something for their teacher’s that the teachers can use. This year they gave their teachers home made snowflake magnets. Last year they made gingerbread men foam notebooks and snowflake bookmarks.