Since he was 3, my son has attended Japanese summer school. It is a rigorous program, but he also gets to have fun attending field trips and playing outside for about an hour and a half a day. All the Japanese that he forgets during the regular school year comes back to him, and he enjoys it.
This year, his little sister has joined him.
Just like that our cost have doubled.
Paying for one child to go to Japanese school in the summer was expensive; paying for two children is prohibitive, especially when we have so much debt to pay off.
Thanks to our tax return, we were able to afford the first session, which only runs 3 weeks. There are 2 more sessions for a total of 5 more weeks. We had hoped we would have enough money to send the kids for the rest of the summer, but unless something unexpected happens, the money is not there. We are still brainstorming ways we may get the extra money, but we only have a week and a half to come up with some of the money.
And though I know it is silly, I feel a bit like I have failed my children.
When I was young, there was no summer school or extracurricular activities. There was just my bike and my best friend who lived a few doors down. As a special treat every few weeks, we would spend the day at a friend of a friend’s pool. I read a lot, and I played a lot.
Still, I feel sad that I can’t send the kids when they are enjoying going to Japanese school. I feel the pain of sacrifice for debt repayment.
And that sadness and pain tells me that good things are happening in our lives. We are living like no one else so later we can live like no one else.
Have you felt the pain of debt repayment lately? Did it make you stronger in your resolve to be debt free so you can enjoy financial freedom in the future?
Our Progress
No progress this week.
In the last 36 weeks since we have gotten gazelle intense, we have “found” $7,099.25 to snowflake!
Take a step back. Which is more important, not just for entire family, but thinking only of your kids? Is it more important for them to have fun on field trips or to learn to live on what things/money they have? Think about that and then kick that guilt to the curb. You are doing the right thing. You already know that, but as a little bit older mom, I want to reinforce that. My kids are now 15 and 12, and I actually regret giving them some of the things we did. I think we have done a good job of talking to them about why we make the decisions that we do, and I know that they have the concepts down, but having lived like no one else earlier on, we do have more money available now and sometimes I have to remember to say no just for the sake of saying no, if that makes sense. I have to say no because they don’t need to have everything even if we have the money to buy it. See – the challenges of parenting just never stop. 🙂 But I am SO thankful we took the Dave Ramsey route over 10 years ago, because when life events (3 moves in one year along with cancer plus more ‘stuff’) happened, we had the financial resources to survive without taking on any non-mortgage debt. We are still rebuilding after that, but the tools we learned early on make that easier. Keep it up – it will pay off in more ways than you can imagine.
Very true. However, Japanese school is important to both my husband and I because my husband’s family is still in Japan, and we want the kids to be able to speak the language. Hard choices, for sure.
Your children were able to have three weeks of Japanese school. They don’t necessarily need to have the whole summer. You describe your childhood as having no camps to go to, but it sounded like you had relaxing summers of playing, riding your bike and reading. There is a lot to be said for that.
My best friend in high school was Japanese American. She and her 2 sisters were born and raised here, and she tells me that their parents would speak Japanese around them and they had little to no idea what they were saying. They always were sent to visit relatives in Japan over the summer once they were in middle school. One summer, I spent a month with Yana (my friend) in Japan with her uncle. She could speak as much Japanese as her 2 year old cousin, but we all got on fine. In college, she and her sisters took Japanese, as did I. Her sister became fluent enough to teach English in Japan.
There will be other opportunities as they get older. Have you thought of setting up your own Japanese immersion program? I see there are a lot of free resources on the web. The hiragana and katakana learning tools I used in college were essentially geared towards young children. We also had to do an exercise where we glued the Japanese names of things to objects around the house, so we could get used to those words. Perhaps you can make due with building your own home program until you can afford it next year?
Thanks for sharing this story. We plan to fly to Japan when our youngest two are older (they are 2 and 3 now), so hopefully they will pick up more Japanese then. I don’t worry about the speaking so much as the writing.
Just because you can’t afford it this year doesn’t mean you won’t be able to afford it next year if you continue your gazelle intensity and get the debt paid down 🙂
I’m sorry you feel like you are failing, but you really aren’t. Your kids love you and rather see you happy in the long-run than go to the Japanese school in the short-term…this is from a kid’s perspective. I was always most happy when the family was just less stressed.
As far as the extra income, I really wish June had not sucked so much and am crossing my fingers for a much better July.
Don’t be so hard on yourself! I know what you mean – I sometimes feel like I’m failing my kids even when I know I’m not – and we as moms can really be our harshest critics. It doesn’t help that moms can be competitive with one another.
Hang in there!! You will be able to do many more things for your children over the next 10+ years if this debt is gone!!! I am so proud of you. I know that it hurts. And you are right, it is supposed to.