Goals for August, 2017

Back in January, I set some audacious goals for myself, knowing I wouldn’t achieve them all, but eager to give it my best shot.

Dealing with Autism


What I didn’t know then was that our child who was diagnosed with autism in December would continue to struggle.  Like a drowning person who tries to sink the one who is trying to rescue her, our child with autism wreaked havoc in our lives.  For awhile, especially after I had surgery, I felt like I could accomplish very little because I was so busy trying to manage this child and the child’s wildly swinging emotions.

It was exhausting, and if I’m being honest, depressing.

Waiting to Return to a “Normal” Life

All I could think about was getting to the other side where life can be normal again.

Things are better now, but they’re not normal.  And they’ll probably never be normal again.

But, I just watched an inspiring YouTube video by Claire Wineland, a 20-year-old who has cystic fibrosis, and I love something that she said:

“When we’re suffering, we all have this notion that we kind of should just stop living, and all we should focus on is how to get over it, how to get to the other side, and I genuinely believe that there is no other side.  There’s so much more to life than just being healthy.”

And when I heard her say those words, I realized I had put my life on hold for the last 12 months, while things have been so chaotic, waiting for the time when things get back to normal.  But, they won’t get back to normal, at least anytime soon.  I do firmly believe that this child’s autism can be managed and that the child can be more functional, but I also know that it will take years and years of therapy for this to occur.

I CANNOT put my life on hold while I wait for this to happen.  It’s not fair to myself, my child, my other children, or my husband.

Setting Goals Again

So, even though I know I won’t be able to accomplish all of my goals, I do want to start goal setting again and getting back into living my life.

Here are the goals I’d like to accomplish in August:

Get the kids on a school routine.  That means writing out a schedule each weekend and completing the assignments on the schedule each week.

Sew one project for a Christmas present.  Thanks to all of the therapy said child is in, money is very tight.  I plan to make several homemade Christmas presents for my kids.

Sew my daughters’ AHG badges on their vests.  AHG starts again mid-August, and the badges need to be sewn on by then.

Set up a chore schedule for my kids.  I’m reviewing the Everyday Family Chore System, and I’m excited to set it up and start using it.

Say the rosary at least 14 times this month.  I’ll admit it, I’ve been a little angry about this autism diagnosis, and my prayer life has suffered.  I want to get back into the routine of saying my prayers.

Take a trip to California with my family.  My husband has to renew his Japanese passport at a Japanese consulate office, and the nearest one is in L.A., so we’re headed to California sometime this month.

That’s it for goals.  Sweet and fairly simple, and a very good way to get back into the goal setting routine.

How do you get back into “life” when your world feels chaotic?

 

 

Comments

  1. My thoughts are with you and your family as you navigate this new chapter. Don’t forget about some self care – and exercise is a great start. Begin with walking just 20-30 minutes a few times/week. Start small. Most importantly, start. just start.

  2. I definitely understand how it feels to have a child’s diagnosis bring chaos to your life. One of our children was already diagnosed with ADHD and has been diagnosed with dyslexia, dysgraphia, and dyspraxia in the past 6 months. We started OT and PT for a total of 4 times a month and dyslexia tutoring weekly. In the process of working with the school on an IEP, it was brought up that there are some autism red flags and the speech eval showed poor social pragmatics. We are now in the process of evaluating for that too. I am very fortunate my job is flexible,part-time,and work from home,otherwise I could not work at all, and our medical costs are very increased. The tutor alone is $300/month and we suspect our 6 year old has it too and will need the same tutor by year’s end. We decided to give up some activities this year to give us some downtime and I have had to learn to stop saying yes to every request for help.

    • I hear you. With a diagnosis like this and all of the medical bills, I need to work more, but it is nearly impossible given the state of our family right now. Each of my children need so much of my time right now. I hope things work out for you!

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